guardians_song: A sprite edit of Nils from Fire Emblem, looking shocked: CHRISTMAS EDITION (Nils)
guardians_song ([personal profile] guardians_song) wrote2014-01-27 09:58 pm

Had to take a nap due to being mildly under the weather.

Had a weird dream, which goes somewhat as follows:

I was taking the role of some sort of totally AU Peter Parker. However, at the same time, I knew it was fictional and was, on the meta level, playing some sort of game. This is common in my dreams; I often switch between being a made-up game character and playing that game as the character.

At any rate, the character's mother was working for some shady genetics corporation and was going to unleash a giant caterpillar-monster named "the Hogfather" (yes, I noted the Terry Prachett reference within the dream and wondered why they called it that) upon the character's home, whereupon Peter's powers would activate in self-defense when it attacked him, though he would black out as to what precisely happened, and she would fake her own death at the monster's hands... caterpillar-feet... whatever.

Instead, because I knew the plot, I deliberately made an effort to evade the Hogfather as long as possible... basically because that wasn't What I Was Supposed To Do. Yes, I enjoy screwing with compelled-plots in real-life manipulation of fiction as well.

So I ran around the apartment (which, I noticed, was a replica of an apartment my family used to live in), playing dumb as the monster bashed in the door (and the character's mother claimed it was his father trying to bash down the door/a monster sent by his father once the thing actually made its appearance), and eventually, because there was no other exit, slid open the second-story window, tossed a large Pikachu pillow out onto the parking-lot asphalt below, and jumped out onto the pillow. (Don't give me that look. It was literally what was available in the dream at the time.) The character survived and started running, though with serious shin splints.

Apparently the mother got out too (I guess in the interests of verisimilitude for her long-term alibi), and they drove off through thick traffic. In-dream, I presumed the thing was occupied attacking drivers a few cars back. (It was nighttime, incidentally, so... maybe it had poor vision?)

At any rate, when in daylight, the character and his mother discussed what could have sent that thing. Apparently there were two companies, one of which was the correct one, and the other of which was called "Pindex" (as I recall) and was located in Lagos, Nigeria (also with a bunch of other garbage address information that I no longer recall). Because I knew perfectly well what the actual situation was, I had the character make snarky comments about 419 scams and such, but the character's mother was insistent that it was totally Pindex and it was all the character's father's fault.

(Before you ask: I think he had an absent father who had absolutely nothing to do with the whole situation. The 'designated' plot was that he woudl THINK his father did and, as Spider-Man, go on some epic quest of revenge against the corporation and what he thought was his father's plans, only for a BIG TWIST! that his father wasn't behind it after all. So yeah, I was basically massively sequence-breaking and trying to RP Peter as a tech-savvy information broker. Not that I really got to that part, but I remember that clearly as my intent.

...So, basically, it was the break-the-game-plot version of those fanfics where the main character somehow gets foreknowledge of a chunk of the plot and so becomes a brains-over-brawn mastermind rather than a dumb, naive overpowered shonen hero. Except that I was actually denying Peter access to powers so long as I kept ahead of the forced plot events, so I didn't have those fanfics' usual option of taking the overpowered status and stuffing the foreknowledge on top of it for a complete world-breaker. Apparently even my dreams are principled on this point, what can I say. :P)

At this point, because I was wondering where the Hogfather was, it segued to a chat with a bunch of... frat boys, for lack of a better term, who were discussing how the game actually worked. Apparently it based the closeness of the Hogfather to you upon your actual location (!), which... made them all laugh their asses off, because apparently the game was calibrated to assume you'd be in California by default and became an absolute laughingstock on the "Hogfather" front if you were anywhere else, because the game spawned the Hogfather in California and essentially would never manage to have it reach you if you were several states away. (For reference? One of these guys was apparently a native of Nebraska. There was a computerized map showing how ridiculous the situation was.)

Keep in mind that this thing's top speed was apparently around the same as a (not-particularly-athletic) teenage boy's. Intimidating in person? Sure, but it wasn't exactly going to win any prizes for inter-state pursuit.

Of course, my RL location was where the Hogfather spawned, so long-term (in the game) I had a problem...

The advice they gave me in this casual chat, before the dream segued back into the game, was to not faff about with any unnecessary plot and I'd just barely be able to stay ahead of the Hogfather. (I suppose I wasn't the only one who'd done this... the implication in the dream was that most of the players were from California, though some weren't and so gained a hilarious advantage with the 'Hogfather' subplot, as I said.)

We then segued back to some sort of well-lit restaurant/bar where the character was chatting with his mother, and she insisted that Pindex was on an ~untraceable server~. I went on to rant at great length (with dubious technical accuracy) that there was no such thing as an untraceable server (is this true? I honestly don't know), but the character's mother was quite stubborn about it and angry that he'd argued with her. I knew, based on timing, that the Hogfather was incoming, but was confident in my ability, in-game, to again get to safety.

And that was where the dream ended.

I also had a weird follow-on dream that had to do with Nigerian scammers exploiting people by selling packages to people that were supposed to help, but in reality did nothing and were just trackers to monitor what they were doing. About the only feature they had, as I recall, was an option to input your name. (They cost about $40 apiece. I don't recall what their function was supposed to be, but that was all they were.) Incidentally, if you're trying to figure out why I keep dreaming of topics relating to Nigerian scammers, I've read a lot of scambaits recently.

This was also all happening in the (realistic-looking) setting of a Pokemon hack, complete with Lance, so at one point there was an Indigo Plateau PokeMart where you could buy Rare Candies for ~11050P apiece. That was a steal, but I remember some debate as to whether that was balanced or not. (Mainly I recall the argument that it was, since you could buy three Full Restores for the same amount and that the healing items were likely more useful.)

I woke up in the middle of it, so I don't have good recall, but I remember that some generous soul ended up buying a lot of these packages to give to people and so got taken for a lot of cash. I think I was trying to help her... or something. That subplot is really foggy.

Anyway, the AU "Peter Parker" dream was very detailed and interesting, so I figured I might as well write it down.