I have little interest in a dithering hero; nor am I much inspired by revenge plots. Yet I keep hearing that this is the greatest of them all. So I analyzed the story to see what it would take to make me care about it.

So... he does this by taking everything that's memorable or remotely human about Hamlet's character. Okay.

Did Card have Daddy Issues growing up? 'Cause sheesh. Also, for being so heavily entrenched in the All Gays Are Pedophiles myth, he sure stuffs his writing with a lot of homoerotic subtext.

"I don't have time for Laertes. He must know I didn't mean to kill his father," Hamlet said.
"It's not his father," said Horatio. "It's his sister."
"Ophelia? I didn't touch her."
"She killed herself. Walked out into the sea, dressed in her heaviest gown. A funeral gown. Two soldiers went in after her, and a boat was launched, but when they brought her body back, she was dead."
"And for that he wants to kill me?"

DEAR GOD, SHOW SOME FUCKING EMOTION. "Hamlet, a pack of lions has been set loose upon the kingdom! Your dog was one of the victims." "Why would someone use lions instead of tigers?" "Dude, your fucking dog just died!" "Oh. That's awful. That sucks."

Thank you, Card, your metaphor for women brought to mind a certain memetic commercial from Japan.