(Note: This is abnormally long because Oneword.com bugged up the first time, so I had to reload the page [and I kept what I'd already written]. Apologies.)

"Are you tracking me?!"

"Yes, admittedly, I am. You were very obvious."

"Oh, come off it! Don't you know there are yaoi fangirls about?!"

"Shut up, my pretty, and stand still," one called from the bushes. "Be Matthew's desu desu uke, will you?"

"But I don't want to!"

"Oh, come on," Matthew said cheerily. "It won't be so bad... better than the time Legault ended up being one, at least."

"But I'm not!"

"Your other option is Karel."

"Oh. Uh - oh, Matthew-san, be gentle~!"