guardians_song: A slightly edited posterized version of King Zephiel from Fire Emblem: Rekka no Ken. (Amused)
guardians_song ([personal profile] guardians_song) wrote2013-07-05 09:32 pm

Linked from Harp.

Mike Smith's Snarky Answers to the Leaky Cauldron Harry Potter Test.

So let's have some snarky answers of my own...

Question 26. What did Fred suggest the D.A. name themselves?
Different Anon. Rejected suggestions for acronyms were AYRT and A!ANON.

Question 30. What does Ron leave behind in his Apparition test, that causes him to fail?
His virginity.

Question 36. How many months does it take to brew Felix Felicis?
As many as the plot demands and not a second more.

Question 44. What's at the core of Harry's wand?
Apparently Voldemort's magical heir. *throws up hands* I didn't write Deathly Hallows, I'm just sayin'...

Question 47. Which Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher wears a lot of pink?
Gilderoy Lockhart, behind closed doors.

Question 51. The twins bet 37 Galleons, 15 Sickles and how many knuts on the world cup?
All four of theirs, which made them shuffle about painfully and speak in unusually squeaky voices until they tracked down Ludo Bagman and beat him up.

Question 52. Who did Harry see waltzing around the Room of Requirement in a dream?
Tom Riddle, wearing only Nagini.

Question 53. What book did Hermione read in the Room of Requirement?
So You're A Bookish Hogwarts Student Who Wants To Become An Evil Overlord, by G. Grindelwald

Question 56. What book did Hermione read so fast her eyes appeared blurred?
Helga Hufflepuff's Time-Traveling Tales of Hardcore Wizard Slash, 3rd Edition

Question 60. What does Ron suggest Harry really drank when he took the Felix Felicis?
[REDACTED]

Question 65. What creature, according to Luna, is invisible, floats in through your ears and makes your brain go fuzzy?
Idiotballspurts. I hear Voldemort had quite a severe case of them.

Question 66. Which of Dumbledore's middle names does he share with a Weasley?
Thatgingersnot. Stunningly, he also shares this with Aberforth, Lily Evans, and at least one of Harry's children.

Question 68. Name the centaur whose name means "a cause of harm, ruin or death."
Uweboll.

Question 70. What are Dumbledore's hobbies?
World conquest, manipulation, horrifying astonishing people with his fashion sense, and spending long hours in his office alone with a teenage boy.
...Hey, J.K.R. brought that last one up, not me. (And, incidentally, did she have to have Rita Skeeter attach that scandal to the ONE GAY CHARACTER IN THE SERIES? Seriously?)


Question 77. What type of wood is the handle of Ron's broom?
Hard, long, and bendy wood. And thick, mustn't forget thick.

Question 78. Where and when was dragon breeding banned?
The aftermath of the first Wizarding World Furry Convention.

Question 82. What did Luna say was responsible for Zacharias Smith's failure to maintain the Quaffle in book six?
Erectile dysfunction.