guardians_song | *bursts in, waving about archived links*

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cori falls

bursts in, waving about archived links

See, by going back to a very early version of Cori's Geocities city, I found her OLD website! And by hitting a broken link, I managed to get a repository of all the archived pages under that link!

Here we go, folks!

http://wayback.archive.org/web/*/http://members.spree.com/entertainment/cattibrie13/*

(Please note: Not all rants are Cori's. Check the names listed.

However, all are rather nutty. I'm terrified at the prospect of CORI FALLS being the sanest in her fan-corner...)
http://web.archive.org/web/20010215034413/http://members.spree.com/entertainment/cattibrie13/rants1.html
http://web.archive.org/web/20010215035502/http://members.spree.com/entertainment/cattibrie13/rants2.html
http://web.archive.org/web/20010215035917/http://members.spree.com/entertainment/cattibrie13/rants3.html
http://web.archive.org/web/20010306225757/http://members.spree.com/entertainment/cattibrie13/rants4.html
http://web.archive.org/web/20010309183423/http://members.spree.com/entertainment/cattibrie13/rants5.html

I'd also like to note definitive verification of Cori's age at this link:
http://web.archive.org/web/20010306224857/http://members.spree.com/entertainment/cattibrie13/cori.html
Fun fact? She was an English major who graduated Summa Cum Laude! Well, that explains why the technical quality of her writing was actually decent...

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...do I want to do this?

*opens every link*

If my head explodes, you have to put it back together. :P

...Sooooo, do I have to scrape it off the walls yet? :D;;

...oh God. Hot Lips's whining rant about how TR Palace and other fans are "sick". Funny, I remember finding some decent-quality fic at TR Palace. :P

With that I’ll close this rant by saying, “Please Team Rocket Fans and Rocketshippers, let's show the world how much we love these three beautiful characters. And give them something they never had from the brats, RESPECT! And keep all the wonderful Rocketshippy, Friendshippy, and Ash bashing stories coming! ^__^ Thank You."

OH BUT IT'S OKAY FOR YOU PEOPLE TO THROW SHIT AT ASH. /Lyssie mode off

and holy shit Cori's "poor misguided antis" rant. BECAUSE IF YOU DON'T SHIP JESSIE/JAMES YOU MUST BE A POOR MISGUIDED LITTLE SOUL. Here, let Auntie Cori set you straight!

And the Golden Ponyta Patooties. Wow, real mature! >:P Why not just stick your fingers in your ears and go WAAAAH UR A POOPYHEAD, Cori? And jeez, is EVERYTHING about the anime a personal affront to your precious Team Rocket? WAH THE THEME SONG WAH AMERICAN CARTOONS WAH VOTING ON WEBSITES.

...wow.

I'm reading "Cori Gets Bugged". I...I have episodes of shows I can't stand, but Cori just takes it way too fucking far. Hating Tracey just because his Scyther was being a jerk?

Also apparently Misty and Ash are the REAL bad guys because they're immature kids.

Blah blah blah more Ashbashing and TR stanning and whining and tantrums and I kind of want to parody this with Kristan in which Milos sends her into hysterics by bashing Jessie and James. Or have Lyssie and Mila get into a bitchfight over Ash vs. TR ~~in which Lyssie pwns Mila by bringing up the double standard again~~.

All things considered, Gio is a cool guy! The boss is...boss! *hugs poor, misunderstood Giovanni*

I think Silver would have a few words to say about that. :P

WOW. I really hope Cori grew out of this psycho stage.

*scrapes your head off the walls and begins gluing it back together*

WOW. I really hope Cori grew out of this psycho stage.
One hopes so. She's 35 years old now (24 in 2001 + 11 years), so one REALLY hopes so...

Thanks. D: I pretty much skimmed them all, didn't wanna bother going into the down and dirty details except for what stuck out to me.

...oh God. BAD thought. What if she glommed onto Boy Meets World? D: D: D: You know she'd latch onto...no, Shigeru1313 would nab Shawn. Cori would jump on Eric and throw many tantrums over his losing Rachel and his characterization in the final season.

Thanks. D: I pretty much skimmed them all, didn't wanna bother going into the down and dirty details except for what stuck out to me.
Yeah, same here. I think any sporking would cause repeated head-explosions...

and throw many tantrums over his losing Rachel and his characterization in the final season.
I'm not even in the fandom, and that sounds about right...

Yeah. Best to just leave these as a wall of madness to headdesk at, then move on and read porn.

I can't decide how she'd feel about Cory, other than OMG HIS NAME'S LIKE MY NAME. She'd HATE young!Cory, who was a boyish little imp, but she might sympathize with adult!Cory for his True Love fixation. She'd also be a major Jack hater, which would suck if she was working in seasons 5-6, but I'd understand if she was hating on season 7!Jack.

*Sigh* I tried reading through those rants, but after awhile I just skimmed because they got so, so repetitive. What intrigued me was that I actually recognized at least one of the regular contributors (or at least I thought I did): that Charles RocketBoy guy. Didn't he and another writer named Farla write a story in which an Eevee decided to overthrow humans because he hates them and also pokemon training is now abusive for some reason? Weird....

In any case, these people just embody the worst stereotypes of those who like villains. They seem completely unable to grasp that any character Jessie, James, and Meowth hate could possibly have any sort of redeeming qualities. Hell, most of my favorite characters are villains or at very least spectacular assholes; and it often happens that I like characters they hate because the alternative is liking virtually none of the other cast members. There's nothing inherently contradictory about it even; it's just appreciating good, enjoyable characters regardless of moral alignment. The worst bit is that even when Team Rocket help Ash and co. (which they should appreciate, since it means that Team Rocket have more than one side and are not just evil monsters), they can't just "take what they can get;" they have to use that as evidence that Team Rocket should have their own show and are the bigger people. And their acting as though Team Rocket (who are very popular and likely always will be) are so unloved and persecuted by the creators of the show and other fans is blatantly laughable to me, because I've liked several characters now who are genuinely hated by most people in their stories and fandoms. Talk about biting the hand that feeds them....

You know, I don't even think most of these people are fans of Jessie, James, Meowth, or anyone else. If they truly loved Jessie, James, and Meowth they wouldn't have to overlook or ignore their bad qualities or denigrate their enemies just to make them look better; they would appreciate them for what they are in canon, warts and all. I do that all the time (and I'm a twenty-year-old environmental biology student who hasn't taken a single literature class since high school) so why can't they, if they're such clever English majors?

Didn't he and another writer named Farla write a story in which an Eevee decided to overthrow humans because he hates them and also pokemon training is now abusive for some reason? Weird....
Yep. He appears to have taken down his fics, but I distinctly remember him as a Team Rocket fanboy and a friend of Farla's.

I also remember that he loved Team Rocket in VILLAINOUS roles, so I wouldn't be surprised if he jumped ship when Cori went into full-on We're-The-Real-Heroes mode. (And I suspect he genuinely hated the protagonists for being shonen heroes, not for them being Team Rocket's enemies.)

Talk about biting the hand that feeds them....
As I say in the intro to the Cori Falls MSTs on my LJ, Pokemon fandom also has its Slytherfen. :P

I do that all the time (and I'm a twenty-year-old environmental biology student who hasn't taken a single literature class since high school) so why can't they, if they're such clever English majors?
Four words: Black-and-white thinking.

If characters are Good, they cannot have any serious flaws, because then they would be Bad. If characters are Bad, they cannot have any serious redeeming values, because then they would be Good. And they cannot like Bad characters and they cannot dislike Good characters, so any characters they like MUST be Good and any characters they dislike MUST be Bad.

While that's true of a lot of people who are just immature, a bit brainless, or sheltered, I think the people who don't outgrow it genuinely have it hard-wired into their brains. ...It results in some downright peculiar behavior, yes, but it cannot be helped. ...Not that it stops me from mocking the downright psychotic ones (such as Cori Falls and Co.), because they can help how they act upon their views, but anyway...

Anyway, the answer to your question is that they really, really think they're fans of Team Rocket, but they genuinely are not watching the same show/reading the same manga. :| *sigh* And therrrre y'have it...

"AND THE LAST REASON WHY JESSIE AND JAMES ARE A PERFECT COUPLE:

10) Every time Jessie hits James, she's really flirting with him! (That means that she's also hitting ON him! ^_~) "

I'm going to assume this fan is 13 and has no idea about the realities of domestic abuse.

Also, part of the reason Cori hates the "Tracey Gets Bugged" episode is because it reminded her of when she was made fun of for having her red hair cut short and a fic she had the misfortune of reading where Jessie had her hair cut off by Cassidy while Butch raped her. ...No comment.

I'm going to assume this fan is 13 and has no idea about the realities of domestic abuse.
She was a fan of Cori Falls's fics. The former is debatable, but the latter is certain.

Also, part of the reason Cori hates the "Tracey Gets Bugged" episode is because it reminded her of when she was made fun of for having her red hair cut short and a fic she had the misfortune of reading where Jessie had her hair cut off by Cassidy while Butch raped her. ...No comment.
In all fairness, Miss Falls was clearly not all right in the head. I'm willing to believe that the memories genuinely triggered her. Doesn't excuse the way she dealt with it, but the underlying issues are probably legitimate.

...holy shit. The original intro to her page is even worse than her "new" ones. @_@

True, Jessie, James, and Meowth may not be perfect, but they have reasons for doing what they do -- they've had difficult pasts, and that's forced them to make difficult choices.

...yeah. Your "they're not perfect" claim goes down the toilet once you play the "they were FORCED to make difficult choices" card. Choosing to join a gang of thieves is not the same thing as giving up your illegitimate baby for adoption or sticking with a crappy job to support your ailing mother, Cori!

And I've always hated Ash. He's so idiotic, and his self-righteousness gets extremely annoying. Plus, I don't even think he makes a good hero -- he's arrogant, quick to violence, mean-spirited, and he's not that great a trainer! >P

He's also, um, TEN YEARS OLD. A child. I love how she loves TR because they're "not perfect" but trashes Ash for having flaws.

Like all great villains, they're NOT evil -- they just steal all of the scenes that they're in and get all the best lines! (They're so much wittier and funnier...and more interesting than that one-dimensional Ash!) Sadly, however, a lot of people just don't seem to understand this. And the WB network, Nintendo Power magazine, and American merchandisers certainly don't do anything to help.

Why, you'd think they were making this series for kids or something! :O Also this reminds me of a rant by one of her friends about how only little kids like Ash and Pikachu because they're not smart enough to appreciate the depth and complexity of Team Rocket.

Notice how all the best episodes of Pokemon are the ones that have the most J, J & M in them? Not only are they some of the most imaginative and compelling ("The Ghost of Maiden's Peak," "The Purr-fect Hero," "Pikachu Re-volts," "Meowth Rules!," etc.), but they're also the most touching, showing just what good people and pokemon they really are and how much they love each other ("Pokemon Shipwreck," "Holy Matrimony!," "Princess vs. Princess," "Go West, Young Meowth," "Ignorance is Blissey," etc.)!

"Showdown in Pewter City". "Pikachu's Goodbye". "Gotta Catch Ya Later". "Charizard Chills". "Snow Way Out". "Bye Bye, Butterfree". "The Battling Eevee Brothers". "Battling a Cute Drama". "Pokemon Fashion Flash". "Poke Ball Peril". "The Misty Mermaid". Hmm, all "Twerp" centric episodes, TR is just there to be the bad guys or barely there at all...and they're all wonderful episodes that showcase the depth and complexity of the heroes! ...okay, maybe not THAT, but they definitely show us Ash's hidden depths, Brock's awesomeness as a trainer, a breeder and a friend, Misty's gentler side.

You were saying, Cori?

No fictional characters have ever moved me as much as these three have.

Yeah, and few fictional characters have moved me as much as Shawn Hunter or Jan Brady but you don't see me fapping about how they're so superior to everyone else in their shows and how every time someone focuses on Cory or Topanga or Greg or Alice they're "doing a disservice" to fans of Shawn and Jan! ~~At least not ANYMORE with Jan. >.> /kicks fanfic ideas from 8th grade under her bed to play with the dust bunnies~~

...holy shit. The original intro to her page is even worse than her "new" ones. @_@
Le batsheet someteems does not EENCREASE weeth age. :P

He's also, um, TEN YEARS OLD. A child. I love how she loves TR because they're "not perfect" but trashes Ash for having flaws.
No, I think that she means that she loves them DESPITE their imperfection. Notice how, as she gets more invested in them, she carefully removes all flaws of which She Does Not Approve...

Why, you'd think they were making this series for kids or something! :O
*cracks up* Funny you should say that.

...okay, maybe not THAT, but they definitely show us Ash's hidden depths, Brock's awesomeness as a trainer, a breeder and a friend, Misty's gentler side.
{cori} Nonsense! Ash HAS no hidden depths, and Misty has no gentler side! Anything else is pro-twerp propaganda! {/cori}

Yeah, and few fictional characters have moved me as much as Shawn Hunter or Jan Brady but you don't see me fapping about how they're so superior to everyone else in their shows and how every time someone focuses on Cory or Topanga or Greg or Alice they're "doing a disservice" to fans of Shawn and Jan! At least not ANYMORE with Jan. >.> /kicks fanfic ideas from 8th grade under her bed to play with the dust bunnies
Yeah, well, Cori was never known for her reasonableness... D|

Yep. :P

Aah. *nods* Yeah, it's hard to remember that this was from her SANER period re: canon and characterization.

I shouldn't have clicked on that link because I read her "antiRocketshippers" rant:

And I must not be the only one for whom Team Rocket comes to life. Mine isn't the only Rocketshippy site on the web -- it's not the first, it won't be the last, and it's only one in a sea of thousands! (And I'm not the only Rocketshippy author and artist, either -- there's certainly not a shortage of Team Rocket fanfics, fan art, etc.) Besides, I hear from Rocketshippers all over the world who visit my site -- I live in the United States, and that's where most of my online friends are from, but I also have lots of Rocketshipper friends who live in England, Holland, Germany, Brazil, Ecuador, Israel, and Australia. (And who knows how many other countries?) And Rocketshippers are everywhere in Japan, where the show is originally from. It's not just a local phenomenon among a small group of people -- Rocketshipping crosses racial, cultural, and national lines! Can ALL of us be wrong? I DON'T THINK SO!!!!!

Now, if all of the Rocketshippy evidence out there can't convince those poor, misguided anti-shippers that they're wrong, then I don't know what will. With all of the proof that J & J are a couple, they STILL refuse to believe it, or they still try to make up excuses (which seem to be getting weaker and weaker). Haven't they seen that Manga drawing by Toshihiro Ono, where Jessie and James are married and expecting a baby?! That pic should've shut them up right then and there! Besides, it's pretty damned hard to ignore all of the flirting and hinting that they do in both the Anime and the Manga. A person would have to be really dense to not notice how perfect those two are as a couple. But then again, those die-hard antis are so dense that they actually make Ash seem smart! >D

CORI, JUST BECAUSE YOUR SHIP IS POPULAR DOES NOT MAKE EVERYONE ELSE WRONG. Jessie/James being canon in ONE incarnation =/= canon across the board. It's like she's a precursor for Zootarians and Lyn/Hector rabidshippers!

Yep. Oh, Cori, like I said before I really hope you grew out of this.

Aah. *nods* Yeah, it's hard to remember that this was from her SANER period re: canon and characterization.
Yep. Later, she forgot the difference between rants and author's notes. |P

CORI, JUST BECAUSE YOUR SHIP IS POPULAR DOES NOT MAKE EVERYONE ELSE WRONG. Jessie/James being canon in ONE incarnation =/= canon across the board. It's like she's a precursor for Zootarians and Lyn/Hector rabidshippers!
What do you mean, "precursor"? >:D I tell you, if she'd been in Fire Emblem fandom, she WOULD have lived up to Essie!

Yep. Oh, Cori, like I said before I really hope you grew out of this.
I hope so too, but for different reasons. This current fic is creeping me OUT. D:

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bursts in, waving about archived links

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