*laughing my head off* It is like Babelfish gone horribly wrong. I think I read something about catching Bella's rear end with her hair.

...Oh, that was "hidden behind an easel", according to Google Translate. See, that is all you need to know about my French vocabulary.

There is also a lot of face-touching, so Twilight is really the same in every language.

This is really quite educational, but oh dear. Now I'm feeling very sympathetic towards people who don't have English as their first language. :D;;

(Seriously, it... does take a lot of mental energy. The clearest sentence I can make out with my minimal knowledge is "Ah," responded simply the vampire. That, and -

Summary: Alice paints Bella. Bella is not with Edward and Alice is not with Jasper.
NDA 1: Nothing is mine about the characters of Twilight... What a pity about Alice. ^_^
NDA 2: To my beautiful lover who seduced me by not drawing me (???). This is for you.)

I mean, WITHOUT looking at Google Translate, I look at the following sentence and see:
Le premier jour, Alice avait été frappée par l'odeur de Bella.
The first day, Alice was being a frappé for the odor of Bella.
Google says... The first day, Alice was struck by Bella's scent.
That's it, I REALLY need to work on my French vocabulary.